Rabbit Stew
by Irene Claire
Summary: A bit of fluff - literally. Grace finds out the hard way that Mr. Hoppy is a girl! And he/she is channeling the saber-toothed bunny! Enough said. Danno and Uncle Steve help. Doctor Ramirez is my OC from past stories - part of Tripler Army Medical ER staff.
1. Chapter 1

**I do not own Hawaii Five-0 or any characters. No copyright infringement intended.**

**Summary: Mr. Hoppy is a girl! And he/she is channeling the saber-toothed bunny! Enough said. **

**H5O* H5O* H5O* H5O* H5O* **

_**Chapter 1**_

Grace was almost in tears when Mr. Hoppy was finally returned to her welcoming arms. Her new best friend Jake had talked her into letting him take Mr. Hoppy home for a long weekend while Grace, Rachel and step-Stan visited Maui. But Jake had then neglected to return the rabbit for over a full week. And so Rachel had to resort to phoning Jake's mother. And Grace and her mother were now returning home after safely retrieving the beloved bunny.

"I hope you won't do that again, Grace." Rachel gently scolded her daughter who was sitting in the back seat now and holding the rabbit in her arms.

"Sharing a pet is not like borrowing a book. And put him back in the cage while I'm driving please."

Quietly and with a final hug, Grace did as she was asked. And as soon as they'd gotten home, she put Mr. Hoppy back in the small hutch Stan had bought from the local pet shop. It was already heaped high with fresh hay and within minutes, Mr. Hoppy also had a mountain of his favorite treats as the little girl fawned over him. But the next day Grace was in tears again and holding her bleeding finger out for Rachel to doctor with a small bandage.

"He made a funny noise and then he bit me. For no reason!" Gracie sobbed. "I just went to take him out to play and he ran in the back of the cage."

Rachel smiled and shook her head as she cleaned the tiny cut. The rabbit was well cared for and very healthy; he was probably just plain tired of being carted around to strange houses and being picked up all the time. In fact, there were some days where Grace just couldn't keep her hands off him. The poor bunny had even been dressed up in doll's clothes and rolled around in a baby carriage.

Scooping her up into her lap, Rachel gave Grace a big hug. "It's only a tiny little nip. I think Mr. Hoppy just wants to be left alone for a little while. Why don't you make sure he's got enough treats and then go do something else today."

With a sad sniffle, Grace agreed and ran off. She made a face as Mr. Hoppy growled at her again when she plunked the small pile of baby carrots into his bowl. A solid thump sounded in the small hutch as he kicked the wall in a warning.

"Now you stop that!" Surprised and just a little afraid of her bunny, Grace tried to be stern with him. "That's not nice." With a final tearful glance at him, she left the yard and decided to read a book instead of playing with the cranky rabbit.

**H5O* H5O* H5O* H5O* H5O* **

Steve could tell any time when Danny was on the phone with his daughter. He also could judge the mood of the conversation by the ever-changing expressions on his partner's face. At that moment, he and Danny were currently having lunch in a loud diner and Steve grinned as Danny's face practically melted when he heard Gracie's voice. Five seconds later though his face had changed again into one of sad, fatherly concern.

"I promise, Grace. I'll stop by after work. I'm sure he's fine." Ending the call, Danny sighed and then picked at his sandwich. He was frowning and deep in thought as he stared out the window.

Steve waited and then finally gave out with a long-suffering exasperated sigh. "Well? Are you going to tell me what that was about or do I have to guess?"

"That stupid rabbit is sick. Step-Stan's not home to take it to the vet and Rachel doesn't have time."

There was a snort that was quickly followed by a barely stifled chuckle from the other side of the table. "It's not funny Steven. My daughter's very upset about Mr. Hoppy." But Danny's glare fell short and it was all Steve could do to not laugh out right at the predicament.

"Do you have any idea how funny that sounds? Mr. Hoppy." He had to bite his lip to keep from laughing as Danny continued to make annoyed faces at him. But Steve was now wholly unable to stop teasing as he added, "I'm sorry Danno. Really! Anything for Mr. Hoppy, of course!"

But later that day, the two men peered into the evil rabbit's hutch in total confusion. Grace was clutching Danny's hand and practically hiding behind his legs.

"Is that a growl?" Steve asked in surprise as a ferocious sound came out of the little furry throat. "Is that thing actually _growling_ at me?"

"See!" Grace squealed as she pointed at the hutch. "He's mean and nasty. And now he's pulling all of his fur out!"

Everyone looked down closer into the recesses of the hutch. Sure enough, there were mounds of rabbit fur that Mr. Hoppy had studiously plucked out of his own tummy. When he moved in the cage, Danny could see the ugly bare patches of missing fur on the rabbit's body and he made a face.

"Well that's attractive."

Secretly, Danny was pleased that the inferior little creature had lost its tiny mind. His daughter would have been much safer and happier with the monstrous plush pink rabbit he had originally purchased. Step-Stan's fantastic gift had finally shown its true colors. But he nearly choked when Steve's hand strayed unconsciously towards his weapon.

Eyes wide, Danny hissed at him angrily as he covered Grace's ears with his hands. "What are you crazy! Don't even think it! That's my daughter's pet!"

"No, I'm not crazy! But that thing sure is!" Steve watched in fascination as Mr. Hoppy nipped angrily at his food and then gave out another loud growling warning. Then a series of nasty hind leg kicks rattled the small hutch. "I think the damned thing is possessed!"

Their argument almost had Grace in tears again as she wailed about her poor bunny and that he was terribly sick. "Danno, fix it!"

With a disgusted sigh, Danny found the small carry crate and opened the hutch door.

"Vet. We'll just take him to the vet and find out what's wrong with him. Don't worry Monkey, we'll get him better." Carefully, Danny reached in and tried to pick up the rabbit. But Mr. Hoppy had now aggressively backed into the farthest corner of the hutch. And as Danny went to pick him up, the growling intensified and another solid thump shook the hutch. The surprising noises made him jerk his hands hastily out of the way and Danny slammed the door shut with a gasp.

"What's the matter Danno? Afraid of a little bunny?"

"You get him wise-guy." Eye's narrowed as Danny dared Steve to catch the clearly angry and very dangerous rabbit. With a grand display of his hands, Danny took a full step back from the hutch and motioned for Steve to do the honors.

"There you go. Have at it. Mr. Hoppy is all yours."

Grace stared up at them with wide eyes and then showed Steve her small bandaged finger. "Be careful Uncle Steve. He bites!"

At that, Steve smirked at Danny as he reached into his jacket, pulled out his black gloves, and waved them in Danny's face. "Improvise, partner. Get that little crate ready and we'll just dump him in it."

Mortified at Grace's tearful gaze, Steve quickly changed his words to calm the little girl. "Gently. Not dump. _Gently_ put him in his travel box .. thing."

With a barely tolerant shake of his head, Danny got the little crate ready and held it open for Steve. And within seconds, Steve had triumphantly snared Mr. Hoppy by the scruff of his neck. But as he went to put him into the crate, the rabbit kicked out viciously with his hind legs. Danny watched in horror as Steve's eyes went wide and a wide swath of bloody, scratchy furrows appeared from his left wrist down to nearly his elbow.

"_Son of a …_!"

"Language Steven!" Danny croaked in alarm as Steve nearly dropped rabbit in his haste to get him in the small crate. He then slammed the small crate door shut as Steve clutched his arm in pain.

"Vet. Now." Steve nearly growled himself as he inspected the painful bloody streaks running down his arm. Mumbling about stupid demonic pet rabbits, Steve turned on his heel as both Danny and Grace slowly trailed him to the car. He entirely missed the highly amused smile that stretched across Danny's face.

**H5O* H5O* H5O* H5O* H5O* **

It was all Danny could do to not stare at Steve as he angrily drove to the veterinarian's office. And then, when he did look over, he didn't know if he could keep a straight face.

"You okay there Steve?" Danny said lightly as he leaned forward to try to see the oozing scratch marks. "When we get to the vet, you should probably clean that up a bit." The only answer was a thin-lipped and clearly aggravated look that said '_back off Danno before I regret what I may do.'_

"Or not." Danny muttered with a barely stifled grin as they pulled into the veterinarian's parking lot which was mysteriously empty. With a rising feeling of fear, he looked over at Steve who also seemed to have noticed the lack of clientele.

"They're closed? They can't be closed." The increase in unhappy sniffles from the back seat made them both stare in horror at each other and Danny whipped around quickly to calm Grace.

"The doctor closes early on Wednesday's sweetie. But we have another idea. Right Uncle Steve?" Danny's tone and expression were both pleading as he worriedly glared at the man to help.

"We have a plan .. because we're going to _go_ ..?"

And Danny made a '_what do we do_' gesture in Steve's direction indicating that he should chime in now to help him finish the sentence. Grace was obviously becoming more upset again and waiting anxiously for the two men to come up with a solution.

Steve raised his eyebrows in undisguised panic and gave him an answering "_I have no idea!_" look before he slowly stuttered out the first thing that came to mind.

"Umm. Because … we're going to go see … Max?"

But that nearly sent Danny into a choking paroxysm and his face paled considerably. The outburst came out as a low angry wheeze and Grace's eyes slowly widened at her father's tone.

"A morgue, Steven? I'm not taking my daughter to the Medical Examiner's office! The rabbit is not .. you _know_ .. "

"He has tools. Equipment! He's a _doctor_ …isn't he?" Steve hissed in total frustration as he threw a small token smile in Grace's direction. "It's okay sweetie, we're just tossing around ideas."

"Bad ones." Danny muttered disgustedly. "Really .. bad ones."

Seconds later the two were grinning at each other happily. At the same time, both Danny and Steve came to the same conclusion and practically shouted "_Ramirez_!" in unison. Confused, Grace tried to smile as she carefully looked into Mr. Hoppy's small crate. The rabbit was scrunched down in the back and seemed content for the moment. But when he saw his little owner looking at him, a small evil thump sounded.

Nervously, Danny looked at Steve who was already putting the car into gear. "Drive!"

A few minutes later, Doctor Ramirez looked up in surprise from his paperwork as Steve and Danny walked determinedly into his office. There was a bit of blood on Steve's left arm that had stained the body of his white t-shirt. But before he could say a word about that, his eyes went to the small box he was carrying and then over to the child in Danny's arms.

Both men were obviously stressed and the child was teary-eyed and very sad as she blatantly stared back at him with all the trust in the world. Tears were streaming down her face and Danny was grim as he rubbed her back soothingly.

"This is Grace? Am I right?" Ramirez said pleasantly, but still very confused by the unexpected interruption. "It seems as if something's wrong .. what can I do to help? Are you hurt?"

With dual relieved sighs, Steve and Danny relaxed significantly. And then Steve plunked the small box down on the doctor's desk and opened his arms wide as he asked for help.

"Can you please .. _please_ .. look at Mr. Hoppy?"

_**~ to be continued ~**_


	2. Chapter 2

**I do not own Hawaii Five-0 or any characters. No copyright infringement intended.**

**Notes: Yeah, this is a quick hit story. One more chapter will likely do it. Thank you for the great reviews and for laughing with me!**

**H5O* H5O* H5O* H5O* H5O* **

_**Chapter 2**_

"That's a rabbit. I don't do rabbits." The quiet chuffed words were only loud enough for Danny's ears and he visibly winced. He glanced down to Grace who now stood next to him and flashed her a confident '_don't worry_' smile. But Doctor Ramirez was leaning over to once again peer into the small crate and eventually he stood back up with his hands shoved deeply into his pockets.

"It's a rabbit." He remarked again dryly. "This is a military medical hospital for people. I do people. Not rabbits."

The doctor's expression was unreadable as he studied each of the three anxious people who had invaded his office. And now it was clearly an invasion … a very misguided invasion … if they all thought he could examine and treat a very agitated rabbit.

Danny was pleading as he casually nodded to Grace who had finally stopped her sad sniffling. But her face looked crest-fallen again at the doctor's bland statements.

"Exception please. Just this one time. The vet office closed early and we're a bit … _stuck_."

Doctor Ramirez gazed down at the little girl and attempted a weak bemused smile. He was clueless about doctoring animals, but her wide-eyed solemn expression drew him in easily. With a disgusted huff, he motioned towards his office door and readied his stethoscope.

"Close that." Steve turned quickly and closed the door before the doctor could change his mind. But he then stopped Ramirez who had reached out towards the crate. Digging into his pocket, Steve pulled out his heavy-weight black gloves and held them out across the desk.

"Ah. You'll need these .. he's a little upset." Ramirez raised his eyebrows in astonishment as he grudgingly accepted the gloves and then glanced to Steve's injured arm.

"Mr. Hoppy?" The brief positive nod was all he needed to hesitate entirely before approaching the caged animal.

Steve muttered as he pointed to the small animal and then to his arm. "Use the gloves. He's a little demon."

Frowning, Ramirez peered once again into the crate and almost sat back down in his chair in amazement when the warning low growl sounded through the bars. "What else has he done?"

Excited now that a real doctor was finally caring for her rabbit, Grace squirmed forward to stand near the crate and next to Ramirez. She very seriously explained what Mr. Hoppy was like, showed the doctor her finger, and then pointed to Uncle Steve's arm.

"He's not nice and he used to be. Now all he does is growl, and he bit me. And he's pulling all of his fur out of his tummy and making piles of it in his hutch."

A small knowing smile finally crossed the doctor's face and he considered a few more important questions for Grace. "Does Mr. Hoppy have any rabbit friends by chance? Any that he's seen very recently?'

Danny grimaced at the silliness of the question. "No. He's an only rabbit."

The undisguised sarcastic comment from Steve made Danny hang his head and glower; he then completely ignored Steve's mere existence in the office. "Is that like an only child, Danno?"

But Grace interrupted them both to explain that her friend Jake had Mr. Hoppy for over a week. And Ramirez began to smile even more about the possibility that was now taking shape. "And does Jake have his own bunny, too?"

"Yes, he has another boy rabbit named Bailey. He's all white and has red eyes."

Steve was watching Danny who had frozen in place as soon as Grace mentioned a boy's name. He couldn't help beginning to quietly chuckle as Danny's face changed entirely and he burst out with, "_Who's Jake?_"

The rabbit issue was clearly forgotten for the moment as Danny stared at his daughter in total surprise. But Steve was easily keeping up with the doctor's questioning and newest train of thought. He was already up to the "_Jake has another rabbit_" part of the conversation and putting two and two together. And as soon as Grace confirmed that the two had been together for a whole week, he exchanged humorous looks with the doctor. Mr. Hoppy was most decidedly not a boy and _**she**_ was likely very pregnant.

But now Grace only grinned up at her father and shrugged. "Jake's in my class and we're friends. I let him take Mr. Hoppy home. He played a lot with Bailey. They like each other."

Doctor Ramirez casually tossed Steve's unused gloves back to the now openly grinning man. He cleared his throat to get both Grace's and Danny's undivided attention as he once again shoved his hands deeply into his coat pockets. His voice was very serious but his eyes were sparkling as he made one simple statement.

"You're gonna need a bigger hutch, grandpa."

Danny hesitated and then frowned at the doctor's odd choice of words. Grace stayed totally confused as her father quieted down, mulled over what the doctor had just announced, and then looked blankly over to Steve who had begun to laugh out right.

It took another moment, but Danny's eyes began to bug and his face turned crimson.

"Grace Williams. What have I told you about talking to boys!"

_**~ to be continued ~**_


	3. Chapter 3

**I do not own Hawaii Five-0 or any characters. No copyright infringement intended.**

**Notes: This is the last chapter! Thank you ALL AGAIN for the great reviews and for laughing with me! I had this story in my head for months and finally finally got it down to paper. I hope you all enjoyed it. **

**H5O* H5O* H5O* H5O* H5O* **

_**Chapter 3**_

With absolute disgust, Danny buckled his daughter safely into the back seat of the Camaro. The newly confirmed _**Mrs**_. Hoppy who was undoubtedly now "_**with** **child**_" was plunked down unceremoniously next to Gracie in the small travel crate. Doctor Ramirez's announcement was mind-boggling; but in short, there was absolutely nothing wrong with the small bunny. He was a _she_ and she was definitely going to have babies.

Ramirez wound up being happy to help and kept chuckling incessantly over the unexpected diversion. He even looked up 'breeding rabbits' on the internet before they all left his office. And Grace now proudly waltzed out of Tripler Army Medical with an official file folder stuffed with interesting facts and information about how to care for pregnant doe rabbits.

Grace was delighted and giggling non-stop about the prospect of "_**Mrs**_." Hoppy having baby bunnies.

"He's a _**girl**_, Danno!" She shouted excitedly for the hundredth time as they walked out to the parking lot together. But Danny was still less than enthused about this new Jake person who was Grace's new very best friend and what been done to Mrs. Hoppy.

"Little deviant." He muttered quietly as they got to the car. Bnd then his eyes widened even more at Grace's next words and he couldn't help slamming the passenger side door on her beaming face as she mimicked Doctor Ramirez.

"But Danno, you're going to be a _grandpa_!"

"That's it. I'm done. Finished." He then threw his hands up in the air and leaned over the hood of his car in mock defeat. Steve was paralyzed as he practically howled with side-splitting laughter; in fact, tears were streaming down his face and he needed to brace himself against the car. Before leaving Doctor Ramirez's office, Steve had gotten his arm cleaned up and the biggest scratches were now covered with small bandages. He fixed a piece of tape that was uncomfortably pulling at one of the small slash marks as he vainly tried to stifle the ongoing surge of persistent cackles.

"What are you going to do Danno, sue Jake's family for paternity or cut off all relations?"

Danny once again glowered at Steve as he re-opened the door to slide into his car. "No." And he waggled his finger sternly at Grace who was sitting happily in the back seat with her rabbit. "But what have I told you about boys? See what happens!"

His daughter's reply was a dramatic eye roll and yet another giggle with Steve once again unable to help himself from joining in a new bout of laughter. The two of them earned withering looks from Danny, who admittedly was now having a very hard time hiding his own amused smirk. The whole thing served step-Stan right for gifting the little tyrant to his daughter. Now a _dog_ .. that would have been a worthy pet .. man's best friend. But a _rabbit_, that had even more _rabbits_ .. an abysmal creature who you couldn't tell was a boy or a girl without a doctor's help or until the dastardly deed was done. It wasn't normal. Danny heaved a sigh and then gave out with a hint of a snicker.

"Fine. Now you can tell step-Stan that he needs to get you a bigger hutch."

"But I want you to do it, Danno." The softly voiced request came from the back seat and Danny awkwardly turned around in the car. Grace's chin trembled in anguish at the mere suggestion that Stan be the one to replace the small rabbit hutch. "You need to do it for Mrs. Hoppy. With Uncle Steve."

Almost afraid to ask, Danny needed to make sure he understood what Grace wanted. "Do what exactly, Monkey?"

"I want you to build _**Mrs**_. Hoppy a bigger hutch. A pretty one for her babies." Startled, Danny looked in a panic over to Steve and was immediately relieved to see him shrug off-handedly at the plea.

"I have a work shop and tools. All we need is decent wood, hinges and chicken-wire." With all the confidence in the world, Steve bent down to grin at Gracie in the back seat. A huge smile slowly spread across her face as she held the small crate on her lap.

"One new improved, rabbit-worthy townhouse - on its way!"

**H5O* H5O* H5O* H5O* H5O* **

The new hutch was delivered to the Edward's residence in the back of Steve's pickup truck. Danny and Steve set it up in a shady area of the yard where it would be well-protected from the elements. They had built it together in Steve's garage dedicating a solid week of after hours time. And Danny had turned out to be more than handy and creative with a wood router and hand tools. When they finished the piece, not only was it impressively beautiful, but equally functional.

Rachel couldn't help laughing with her own delight; amazed at the size of the thing and the ornate princess scallops of wood that had been designed into the structure. There was even a name plate declaring "Mrs. Hoppy's Townhouse" attached above the main door. Other smaller side doors made both feeding and cleaning the mother-to-be, extremely easy. It was two stories high with a small rabbit-sized plank for hopping up and down each level. And the right side was completely enclosed so Mrs. Hoppy could have private time with her babies whenever needed.

And before school let out for the day and Gracie came home to her magnificent surprise, they had it heaped high with fresh straw, clean hay and a brand new, special nesting box for the pending birth. Steve smiled as he hung up the new water bottle on the inside frame and proudly patted the sloped roof.

The issue then was getting the agitated and now very chubby Mrs. Hoppy into her new palatial home. Both men stood for a long time simply staring at the bunny who had once again begun to growl in the back of its old hutch. It sounded louder and more ominous than ever.

"Your turn." Steve said giddily, as he slapped his thick black gloves firmly into Danny's hands and took two steps backwards, away from the hutch.

"_Grandpa_."

_**~ End ~**_


End file.
